I went to a cemetery with my son for the first time today. It was to go and visit a friend he went to school with who had passed away. This young man was only 19 years old. Way too young to be gone from this Earth.
About mid February I was up late on a Monday night waiting to go and get my son from work. (He is nearly 20 but with his autism, he does not drive so he depends on his father and I to get him back and forth to work). So here it was time for me to go and get him. Now keep in mind it is nearly 11 PM and I try to arrive there just as my son is walking out the doors of his place of business. Well, as soon as I head down one of the main roads to get to him I see police cars. No big deal. A small detour I can handle. But off in the distance I see more police cars. So at this point I know something big is up. Now I am going to have to encounter a major detour.
I know if I keep turning south and east I will eventually get back to my main road. Wrong! They have closed off some side roads due to the bridge and visibility issues. I get it but now I know I am going to be late in picking my son up. And he has a tendency to panic if he does not see me or my husband. Luckily for me and my son I only arrive about 3 minutes late. I explain to him what happened to me and if this should ever happen again, that he is so stay inside the building until one of us arrives. He agreed with no problems.
I learned form my girlfriend that there had been an accident that late afternoon with a kid on a bicycle. Come to found out later that it was a hit and run.
Fast forward a few weeks. Myself and my two children were at the mall and on our way home when we got stuck in mall traffic. The holidays are over so I could not understand this delay...until I look up and see junior police officers stopping traffic in every direction. Of course folks started honking, but there was nowhere to go. Soon enough we figure out why we are sitting. A huge procession of fire trucks and the such come by and it all started with a funeral vehicle. I knew then what was up and once the people in back of us saw it too, they stopped honking.
When we got home that night I wanted to see the news and see what was going to be on the news about this procession. Sure enough there it was first thing on the news. A fireman had died in the line of duty...after the fact. He had contracted some fatal illness and died from complications. First death for the fire department of that county. There is a reason I added this to my post. As soon as that section of the news was done they said there was an update on the hit in run that happened right down the street from me. I was all ears and as soon as I heard the boys name I knew who he was. I screamed for my son to come out and see what was on the news. My son caught the tail end of the clip, so I told him what I had seen.
This boy was one of the few boys that did not bully him in junior high school and Robert remembers those who are/were kind to him. So I tell Robert to get in touch with a girl they both knew but he didn't want to for he had not spoken to her in such a long time and he did not want to her to feel as if he was just calling to find out about this boy. I told him that she would definitely understand. But he still refused to call her.
It had been gnawing at me all these weeks. So I finally put my foot down and told him to call her and find out how this boy was. He did and left a message for the young girl. Two days later my son gets a return call from her and she told him that John had died the day before Easter. I was out taking in clothes off the clothesline with my husband and my son was on the phone. My son is not a phone person and thee only person he likes talking to is my sister and by the tone of his voice it definitely was not my sister. I knew within seconds what was going on and who he was on the phone with. When he hung up he told me John had died. We had missed his funeral by days.
My son found out where he was buried and today we went to visit John. I do not believe in a heaven or hell, for I have no religious beliefs. But I do believe in the fact that people have spirits and what happens to us once we die is anyone's guess. I hope John is in a better place, for how he was taken from this one was tragic and completely unnecessary. Someone out there has to live with themselves and the fact that they took another persons life. I hope that they get what is rightfully due them. I don't want to say I am a vengeful person but I want to be righted and what was done to this young man was wrong on every level.
I cannot imagine ever having to bury either of my children. I don't know how people get up every day and continue to breathe and yet somehow they do. I don't wish death to the person who hit John, but something will happen in this persons life. They may never know why their life is in shambles, why their marriage fell apart, why they lost their job, why they can't seem to fit into the world anymore. It's the Law of Attraction. You will only get what you give and if you give out evil it will come back to you and sometimes ten fold.
Please take the time to look where you are going and try to stay in the speed limit. This was the first time my son had to deal with a death of someone he actually knew. He hasn't said much about it, but I hope he feels he can come to me with any and all questions he may have about what happened to his friend and about death in general. I do not have all thee answers, but I will do my best.